I am a Terrible Friend

Do you guys remember me saying that I was going to go on holiday with my friends this summer? Well yesterday afternoon I went round my friend June's house, and one of my other friends, Taylor, came as well, and we were looking up holidays. We found two hotels which we loved which were both within our price range. So we started getting really excited, especially me and June as I guess we are just a little bit over excitable about these things. We sent links of the hotels to Gee, who also loved them. So we decided that we would book it this week, and everything seemed to be working out perfectly.

I should probably mention here that my friend, Indie, was meant to be coming as well, but decided a couple of weeks ago that she couldn't afford it. This was fine by us, as it actually made things easier (because it is easier to find a 4-person room than a 5-person room). So anyway this-morning me and June were still saying to each other on Facebook how excited we were etc., and looking at how awesome these hotels looked, and checking reviews on TripAdvisor. But then this-afternoon Taylor sent a message on Facebook to me, Gee and June saying that she can't go because she wants to save for University.

She also said all this stuff like "I'm sorry for ruining your holiday", and "please don't be mad at me" and so on. I know it isn't her fault, but I am actually really quite annoyed at her. I know - I am an awful friend. But it is just that I really really wanted to go, and I was really looking forward to it, and now it isn't going to happen. I know I shouldn't be annoyed, but I can't stop thinking that she should just pay for it with her own money, like the rest of us are, instead of asking her parents to pay. She might not have the money right now, but couldn't she borrow the rest of her parents, and then get a summer job and pay them back?

June and Gee have replied saying all the nice things you are supposed to say, but I just can't bring myself to say that I don't mind. Maybe it means I am a horrible person, and an awful friend. And maybe it shows how selfish I am. But I do mind. And I am annoyed about it.

It just really sucks.   

Freya x

*I apologise for how badly written and Ranty/Angsty this post probably was.*